Day 3 sans the Wife
Today I decided to dabble a little in mind-altering drugs. I didn’t do it on purpose it just kind of happened. It started last night when I decided to take a sleep aid to help me get to sleep. When I woke up this morning I was in a daze. I couldn’t focus my eyes and my balance was a little off. None of this affected my hunger though so I had to find something to eat. I stumbled into the kitchen and opened the fridge and yeehaw there was the sushi I purchased yesterday (see picture). Side note: it is always best to eat sushi fresh because something happens to it the longer it sits. So I sat down to eat some sushi for breakfast. I know what you’re thinking; this guy has his life together eating something so healthy first thing in the morning. The sushi didn’t exactly settle my breakfast hunger so I decided to have a couple of crackers with cheese. Seeing as I came this far I decided to have a couple of those crackers with peanut butter and jelly. So with breakfast over I had a good thirst going. Hey I have that new beer I wanted to try so why not? So I popped open a Sam Adams and enjoyed a cold beer. BTW this is quite a tasty beer indeed. The combination of residual sleep aid, sushi, cheese, peanut butter, jelly, crackers and beer has resulted in me not feeling very stable. People pay to feel as messed up as I am right now. I am not sure if the day can get any better.
My plans for today were to mop (the ongoing cleaning of the house) the kitchen and bathrooms. Then at some point get out of the house to do some running, anything really. But I do believe driving at this point would be detrimental to my health and the public’s safety. So maybe I will nap. Petey has finally stopped keeping an eye out for the wife. Hell for a few minutes today I forgot I had a wife anyway.
I have rugs from all over the house in multiple stages of drying on the back porch. I have acclimated to sleeping in a king size bed by myself and I do believe it is my preferred method of sleeping.
I wanted to address a few items here one being that I rec’d a correspondence from a woman claiming to be my wife who said that the Tupperware is and I quote, “Tupperware --> stand in front of the sink...side step left...it is the cabinet by your knees”
I stood in front of the sink and side stepped to the left and looked in the cabinet by my knees. Do you know what I found? Pots and pans my friends. So this is good because I was looking for those also. What I did not find was the Tupperware so to the lady who responded with this false information.
You my friend are an imposter…..
Words to live by today; “It is good for the soul to invest in something you have no control over”
Today I decided to dabble a little in mind-altering drugs. I didn’t do it on purpose it just kind of happened. It started last night when I decided to take a sleep aid to help me get to sleep. When I woke up this morning I was in a daze. I couldn’t focus my eyes and my balance was a little off. None of this affected my hunger though so I had to find something to eat. I stumbled into the kitchen and opened the fridge and yeehaw there was the sushi I purchased yesterday (see picture). Side note: it is always best to eat sushi fresh because something happens to it the longer it sits. So I sat down to eat some sushi for breakfast. I know what you’re thinking; this guy has his life together eating something so healthy first thing in the morning. The sushi didn’t exactly settle my breakfast hunger so I decided to have a couple of crackers with cheese. Seeing as I came this far I decided to have a couple of those crackers with peanut butter and jelly. So with breakfast over I had a good thirst going. Hey I have that new beer I wanted to try so why not? So I popped open a Sam Adams and enjoyed a cold beer. BTW this is quite a tasty beer indeed. The combination of residual sleep aid, sushi, cheese, peanut butter, jelly, crackers and beer has resulted in me not feeling very stable. People pay to feel as messed up as I am right now. I am not sure if the day can get any better.
My plans for today were to mop (the ongoing cleaning of the house) the kitchen and bathrooms. Then at some point get out of the house to do some running, anything really. But I do believe driving at this point would be detrimental to my health and the public’s safety. So maybe I will nap. Petey has finally stopped keeping an eye out for the wife. Hell for a few minutes today I forgot I had a wife anyway.
I have rugs from all over the house in multiple stages of drying on the back porch. I have acclimated to sleeping in a king size bed by myself and I do believe it is my preferred method of sleeping.
I wanted to address a few items here one being that I rec’d a correspondence from a woman claiming to be my wife who said that the Tupperware is and I quote, “Tupperware --> stand in front of the sink...side step left...it is the cabinet by your knees”
I stood in front of the sink and side stepped to the left and looked in the cabinet by my knees. Do you know what I found? Pots and pans my friends. So this is good because I was looking for those also. What I did not find was the Tupperware so to the lady who responded with this false information.
You my friend are an imposter…..
Words to live by today; “It is good for the soul to invest in something you have no control over”
How delicious does this look?
You know how they say looks can be deceiving? Well that is the truth because as scrumptuous as this looks (lol) it tasted like dog food!
2 comments:
I can't believe I told you left! I always get right and left mixed up. It is my form of dyslexia. Didn't know that did you? I also have problems with numbers.
MmmMMM scrumptious indeed.
It sounds like you had a jacked-up day. I like it.
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